Your Smile . My Life
Prelude

Self-denial is a game
so strange i never would've
wanted till there was you.
cause i have learned that love is beyond
what human can imagine,
the more it clears the more i have to let you go.

On vacation


A loner.
A devil.
A pessimist.
A contradictor.


Speak

Your wonderful comments.

Camarederie

Yeeling
Jeffrey
Zhen
Ting^2
Delai
Hui Jun
Ah Yang
Shu Xian

Eliz
Joleen
Adeline
Li Xian
Addy
Hwee Fung
Helen
Ching
Wei Xi
Gou Gou
Kah Weng
Lijing

Ruth
Yirong
Qiu Yan
Ya Yun
Jia Xian
Ming Hui
Wei Wei
Heidi
Wang Chin
Xin Wei
KC
MDK

K Clan
29th Wushu
02s66
HC WUSHU



Credits ©
Designer : PauLeNe
Brushes : xXx
Image : xXx
Software : xXx
Fonts: xXx
Basecodes: xXx
Welcome to My Life
Do you know me?
Are you sure you know me?
I dun even know myself...

木曜日, 3月 30, 2006
I am currently in Tokyo using my friend's com to blog...

I seriously love Japan man...haha...

The Shinkansen is so unbelievable fast man...and comfortable...it's better than my flight plane to Japan lar...of course...it's a budget flight...deh...

Japanese are seriously damn courteous...dunno why...their service attitude is much better in Japan than in Singapore...wa lao...met some so nice and friendly people around...

The Japanese clothes and accessories are seriously damn nice...it's like so stylish compared to Singapore goods huh...u seriously wonder how come the fashion level in Singapore differs from Japan so much....true lar...the weather is much different...one wiht four seasons is like having MUCH more varieties of stuff to wear...and the cold weather allows u to wear much more things...and nicer...like jackets...which is seriously nicer...but then, accessories...hmmm...wide differences...i bought some cheaper(still expensive compared to singapore) but nice accessories...

And good news for the guys, the myth that japanese girls on the street are ugly is TOTALLY broken...before i went over, someone told me that Japanese girls on the street are ugly. The prettier ones are either celebrities or porn stars...I dun not claim to make the statment pls...but it DOES NOT stand...

Japan has seriously so much cute and pretty girls around ya...
Firstly, they are whiter (YI BAI ZHE SAN CHOU)
Second, their complexion is much better
Third, their make up skills are among the top in the world already i think...
Fourth, their eyes...them big and nice...seriously...makes Xiaxue's eyes looks damn far from it man...TOTALLY...Seriously...

No they dun act cute lar...not really...their dressing's not like hello kitty or wat #@!$! lar...stylish and nice...but their school uniform is seriously cute lar....haha...my HWA CHONG uniform is no where near them...and their skirt is damn short...seriously...one was wearing such a short skirt that the pants, i believe is those PE shorts was like 5 cm longer than her skirt or wat....like............

Their voice is like quite high pitch lar...so it's like they seems to act cute...but i dun think so lar...this is a negative point...i seriously can no longer stand that "teh" voice lar...the "Irashaimase"

Still i love Japan...great place...be posting photos soon when i return...see ya guys....i miss u all...going back to play DOTA and BASKETBALL soon...U guys would LOVE to see my Japan trip photos...haha...

火曜日, 3月 21, 2006
Hey guys...by the time u are reading this post, i guess i would have left Singapore le...I have gone to JAPAN...yup i going to back pack there...dun ask me why i choose there, so expensive blah blah...i just felt like going can...yup...

I apologise to say that i left without informing most people...cause i didnt really felt like doing so...i dun really think that me leaving for a tour would matters...most people probably wouldnt care lar...yup...

Dun worry...i dun feel neglected, down...all the depressing stuff ya...not at all...i feel comfortable by myself....

Will take more pictures to post around....yup...

It's a relaxing tour, where i need to recharge myself...physically and emotionally...

I seriously dunno why i so stupid cannot let go of u...i guess i just imagine her to be so young and need me to protect her...so i HAVE to be always there for her...but i guess, she is different now...Everything can change, i dun really care. But ur heart is gone, i guess everything really breaks into pieces....

I guess when one party still loves the other, this friendship's kind of strange...

It's been so long...i guess i REALLY REALLY am numb and tired le...Let this be the last post about u....

Take care people. See You Guys in April when i am back...


P.S.
U know who u are.
If u are reading this, hope i didn't hurt u with this post...I meant to hurt myself to wake myself up from this dream....ultimately, it's still a dream.
I guess even if u are...u can always have a hug somewhere...Ur cross stich, i cant accept. I said before, every heart can only accept one person, and if that is not me, I dun think ur gift from the heart is meant for me. Thanks, i truely appreciate the effort.

I hope when i return we are truely only friends.

Take care of yourself when i no longer can take care of u.

Today...i suddenly had an edge to hug someone...i guess it's anyone bah...ya...while sitting on a cab to Singtel Comms Centre...like my inner child working on me...
Then an idea struck me, that actually everyone have an inner child, be it if u are how stubborn u are, how outspoken u are, how proud u are, how vain u are, how powerful u are, how strong u are...And the inner child is the one guarding ur inner most emotion and feelings..

And how did this come about? Cause why not we have INNER OLD MAN?

Cause when babies were babies(deh...), we start to grow...physically and emotionally...so wat happen is that the inner person in the baby is a baby and so they have no double tots about their feelings...sad mean sad...happy means happy...

AS we grow older, physiaclly, we grow...but emotionally, out inner person grows much slower...cause when young, we do not experience much emotional aspect of life, as such, emotional growth is slower...so in the end, most people have a grown up physical, yet inner child(haven grown up yet lar)...That's why people tend to have double meaning...everytime they say dun want smthing, probably deep down their heart they want...they try to be independent, strong, yet deep down, they serious just long for a warm hug from a love one.

Every smiling face, comes a tear behind the smile...every act of independence and bravery, comes a yawning for an embracement of love....



See this Teddy Bear? Makes u feel like hugging rite...


Dun be shy lar...it's ur inner child working up...

I made it a point to try to touch as many heart as possible...be a true friend and always there for anyone, anytime..sometimes u serious wonder who is truely there for u when u need a friend to give u a hug...I always tell myself to cherish everyone around me....dun u ever wonder do people cherish u when u are around them...And wat does being there for someone seriously means? For Most people, including me i guess, it's like just on ur lips and sms, that ya "take care ya...i will be there for u when u need"...ya, so when do u know i need u and when are u coming for me...

Thinking this stuff's kind of skeptical...I guess i rather hug a teddy bear, who's always there for me...when i turn my head behind i know he's there...

I dun have a teddy bear le lar...i think i go hug my sister's one...haha...

Anyway, so the moral of the story is, most of the best emotions in life are not spoken. They are felt with ur heart. And this is the only way to seriously touched someone deep down in their heart and brighten their life...

Ask urself if u have done it...

For those who have someone like that for u, u are a lucky #$%$@~...u BETTER open ur heart and eyes to cherish that someone who sees u with his or her heart...

月曜日, 3月 20, 2006
I just finished GOONG Episode 16...it's like 3.45am now..haha...it's such a funny and interesting show...haha...i will recommend it to anyone...for all ages...ha...I decided to leach someone's page for the pictures to post here..haha...here's some GOONG's pics...







See the 2 guys quite handsome one lor...one girl is the funny cute type...the other is the pretty aura aura type lar...u get the idea...=P...i dunno wat are their names lar...u know korean names are all...kind of difficult to remember properly lar..ha..and abit difficult to pronounce one...YA LAR YA LAR...I LOUSY CAN.....

Pics from this girls' blog....

Must give credits lar...if not i feel damn bad...i dunno who she is lar...dunno how i went to her web also...haha...well the world is round...=P

日曜日, 3月 19, 2006
Ok...trying to update all my links on my blog...those guys and girls whom i didnt have a chance to tell u i link u on my blog, if u wish to protect ur privacy...pls tell me..i will remove u...

Think it's only Teresa's blog...haha....cause ur one cannot post comments le...Teri IF u are reading my blog and wants me to remove ur link tell me k...really...

@Jeff...yes bastard,...i am reading ur blog too...and then u better not get fatter hor...meet up when u get back k...

To the rest...whether u haven been reading tiz or u chance upon like the dear famous benjamin phipps..haha...thanks for being concern about my life k...i love all u guys who gave me some good memories...

土曜日, 3月 18, 2006

Currently watching this Korean Drama called GOONG...pretty interesting...amusing...yup...

It's more light hearted compared to the previous 仙剑奇侠传 that i freakin hell dunno why cry so many times (BTW,the TV Channel U one is coming to the boring part le...)

Well the main character in GOONG is quite poor thing lar...but her expression is so funny...haha...got 2 handsome guys and 1 pretty girl and 1 cute girl inside...nice show...

U can download it at Silent Regrets...i lazy to take the graphic links...i still have to upload and paste the code lar...nv...next time lar...yup...it's the english hardsubbed copy...

Do try watching it to destress.....

月曜日, 3月 13, 2006
So many guys are ORDing today...but TMR will be my turn...i haven seen my Pink IC for so long....forgotten how i look like on it lar...

Anyway, i got nothing to do at home...anyone suggest anything?

Oh then i changed my bed sheet to tiZ...



Kirei des ne?

I bet u guys reading are thinking that i really freakin bo liao rite...haha...the truth is I AM freakin bo liao...

But, i never really knew how to use my phone to take photos then send to my com...since my infra port's on my lap top...and i haven got the blue tooth port for Com...so i emailed it to my yahoo account using my phone...and IT WORKS!!!...

Ok...maybe i am sua ku lar...i really never try before mah....dunno how much money i wasted....shit man...

Oh and i foun two of my favourite station YES 933 DJ's blog link...WAH...they are interesting,nice and friendly people...I found the link on AKAGINET...ya...But pls dun disturb their privacy lar...visit visit but dun imitate them or wat lar....

Cheers

金曜日, 3月 10, 2006
Changed the theme song again to match my mood...can u guess how i am feeling now..it's like u suddenly felt that u have seen and felt so much in life...so much so that u realise that u have grown into a different person, regardless of good or evil...and u are no longer the same...

However, u look back to something...or someone, that u have held on to for so long...so so long and yet eventually, it came to an end...

and the person is gone...

That's why it's particularly meaningful to listen to this song...take a short while to close ur eyes and listen...

当泪干
血盈眶涌
白雪纷飞
都成红...

水曜日, 3月 08, 2006
Changed my theme song...so now my whole blog doesn't sound that sad le...
Ok, this song is by JS, called 杀破狼...i think this song is very unique and nice, really, maybe cause i associate the song with the show, so it's really nice lar...brings back memories...if u can hear the lyrics, it's very nice also...

So wat does the title means?
It actually refers to 3 astro signs, 七杀星, 破军星 and 贪狼星...said that when the three stars form a single line, something unusual and big event will occur on earth...yup...chim rite...

Enjoy the song...

月曜日, 3月 06, 2006
逍遥叹
胡歌

岁月难得沉默 秋风厌倦漂泊
夕阳赖着不走词挂在墙头舍不得我
昔日伊人耳边话 亦和潮声向东流
再回首 往事也随枫叶一片片落

爱已走到尽头 恨也放弃承诺
命运知人有梦想法太多由不得我
壮志凌云几分愁 知己难逢几人留
再回首 却闻笑传醉梦中

笑叹词穷 古痴今狂终成空
刀嘲刃乏 恩断义绝梦方破
路荒遗滩 饱览足迹没人懂
多年望眼欲穿过 红尘滚滚我没看透
自嘲墨尽千情万怨 英杰愁
曲终人散发花鬓白红颜殁
烛残未觉与日争辉徒消瘦
当泪干血盈眶涌白雪纷飞都成红

This song is damn meaningful...very nice also...well most people cannot appreciate one lar....if anyone is reading this, try to digest this....damn nice

金曜日, 3月 03, 2006


This is an ultra touching and nice show...sorry to say but i watch the show i really tear quite alot of times lor...be warn, cause it's quite chim and many people probably very difficult to understand ba....but if u understand, it's like so nice and touching...and damn meaningful.....and the 灵儿 is so chio.....