Do you know me?
Are you sure you know me?
I dun even know myself...

NTU NBS FOC was SUPER SUPER SUPER FUN lar...

It was super high lor...plus my OG SIRIUS was quite high lar...abit lost after the camp ended yesterday...super shagged lar...cause never sleep much, like 2 hours a day or wat lar...

So many things to write about, but dunno where to start...

And we won the BEST PERFORMANCE during the showcase. Heard that we are supposed to win the BEST OG one...but dunno why never win lar...cause we were super high always and we won tons of games lar...plus won the showcase night performance....haix...i dunno lar...

I shall write in my diary first, talk about it more when i get my photos from my GLs...

The story i am going to say came from the TV show "Rhapsody in Blue", to make it less drama, i changed it lar...

A:"How do u put an elephant into a fridge in three steps?"

B:"Open the door, squeeze the elephant in, close the door."

A:"How do u put a Giraffe into a fridge in four steps?"

B:"Open the door, take out the elephant, put the giraffe in, close the door."

A:"U see, ur heart is limited like the fridge, and the elephant is like hate. If u refuse to take the hatred out of ur heart, u will never be able to put the love, represented by the giraffe into ur heart."

B"...."

See how meaningful this story is, a simple lame joke, can actually tells alot about life...amazing sia...i love this story, and everyone should really remember it, because if u are so stupid to hold on to something u will never be able to take in something new...like knowledge, like pride, like mistakes, like hatred, like sadness, like love, like everything and anything...learn to let go...really...

拿得起，就应该要懂得放得下...

One of these days i shall tell my kids at the family service center, and pray that they never watch the TV show before...haha...

Working @ Mustafa was quite an eye opener.

I think if i wasn't working at Mustafa, chances are that i wouldnt have gone to Little India area for so many days...I wouldnt have a chance to see the TONS AND TONS of Banglas there during the weekends...it was a little weird...i think it would be scary for a girl alone there...surrounded by tons of them, just standing around, i also dunno why and wat were they doing there...probably, that's the only place in Singapore that feels like home to them...




SEE WAT I MEAN????



Like one of my colleague whose father is a foremen, he told me that the Banglas just drink and laze around when they are free, but they do not cause trouble, as they themselves needed the job here...But we all heard of cases of foreign workers causing trouble, public nuisance in residential areas rite...two sided view point...u decide how u should view them yourself...

There's really this different smell there...haha...I AM NOT SAYING IT'S BAD, i have indian friends too ok...

So it was freakin bad sales there...it's like we sold a spectacular grand total of 1 TV there....WOAH!!!! THREE CHEERZ....-_-"

Anyway, in total of the 5 days there, i sold one DVD player @ $99 and one microwave @ $129...so my comission was $2....haha...

U know i am super pissed...because until now my com's still giving me problems...i am really damn pissed with it lar...like i got all the anti spywares but still got like wat win32 trojon, dsmartloader.exe, virtual mon wat stupid spywares lar...cannot remove one lor...

And my Internet explorer tends to become siao...and cannot go to websites...like i type the address, no effect when i press enter....wat the hell man...

Anyway, was supposed to watch the finals with my army friends, cause i suggested one...then my 4C classmate called to ask me go over to CHIJMES to watch, i said no, cause i already promised the TOCC guys le...in the end, turn out that the organiser our dear LOH CHEE MUN was uncontactable...we wanted to go JEFF's house watch but like couldnt get to inform him...wa lao...super pissed lar...then i stayed at home to watch ALONE lar...WA LAO....

In the end, ITALY WON....YEAH...i guessed that would be the outcome anyway, CHUN HAO was rite lar...haha...he say sure play until extra time/penalty one...now Italy got 4 stars le....why Zidane go and headbutt the guy...he siao one lar...got so many irritating guys around, if he headbutt everyone, he will go crazy man...wa lao...like so old and experience le...still cannot hold his temper and keep his cool on the field...haix..maybe he's getting too proud with the support man...

No wonder ITALY won.

Hmmm...today i seems to feel better after visiting the Investiture for the 30 dunno wat batch le lar...i think is 33rd...

ya anyway, the super old feeling weird feeling's gone, cause i am super old, and have been feeling it since like ages ago...

The thing i that, was just hoping to catch up with people i haven been taking to for ages, like my four super cute junior...only saw 1 today...



Me and Hui Ying


Were u really thinking that she was really super cute?...haha....got u rite...

Haha...ok, i admit she's swt and prettier now...haha...i am a direct person, esp towards complimenting girls...they are free, and it makes them happy rite?...so when u think that some girls are pretty, just tell them directly lar...some guys are just too useless to even tell that the girl is pretty when he thinks so...got so difficult meh...

Anyway, it's just that i haven talked to her for dunno how freakin long le lar...cause she's busy on her way to being a lawyer...haha...So the point was that, meeting her really brightened my day...too bad i got to work, haha...if not can laugh at her even longer...haha...

Was reading her blog when i realise........(DRUM ROLL..) TO THE SIERRA/ARMOUR GUYS reading my blog, JONATHAN KAO and ALEXANDER SIM is also in LAW FACULTY....erm...i feel that the future of Singapore Lawyer reputation might be ruined...haha...i guess is should never spread tales of people...if not how can KAY WEE be on the SMU advertisement...haha...SMU will be ruined if everyone knows about him....

This really gives me a confirmation on wat Jiao Lian said today lar...if u dun have dao de, u will just turn to the dark side sooner or later...especially, if u are clever and in higher positions, the consequences are worst...

GOOD LUCK TO NUS LAW. Oh, and SMU.
Back to the point...

Where's my meng yee, weizi and jing hui lar...stupid juniors...no effort man..haha...

Gone were the days we would gather to talk cock after trainings...haha...actually they are all nice and kind people...if only they were more bonded lar...cause they really cliqued...maybe some small misunderstanding...words and rumours are just too powerful for man to defest...

So ya, shall see them another time...

And haven seen more juniors lar...argh...why must go to work...

Oh, i sold a mircowave and a DVD player each worth $99 dollars today...Hooray...haha...WAH I AM SO HAPPY....(Gee...i sound retarded...)

Ok, the match is starting...hope Germany wins...

李玖哲 - 再见

作词:林燕岑
作曲:jae chong 李玖哲
编曲:jae chong

电话还在响我有些心慌
熟悉的号码在挣扎
故作的坚强虚伪的力量
撑过这一刻更悲伤
没接的电话是一种惩罚
不该想却割舍不下
如果再见我你能说什么
说爱我或只是寂寞
原谅我冷漠选择不联络
因为我担心你会听见我
还那么难过
短讯声在响凌晨两点半
惊醒的房里更孤单
一句睡了吗像你的习惯
这夜晚为你而混乱
因为对你我连再见都
说不出口
我想你能懂爱还在心中

Today i finally know why i hated crowded place so much.

Have u ever walked along a busy street, filled with people rushing around from place to place, talking so loudly and laughing happily. Yet at the same time, u can hear nothing and feel nothing. Just walking aimlessly around, as if the place was totally empty and quiet. In fact, it becomes so so so so empty that it hoolows u from within, making u feel cold under the sorching sun...it makes u feel so weird and out of place, that u just have an urge to scream and shout out loudly on the road...

I think i might just go crazy if i experience it once more...

So as a crowd hater, why have i done such a cock thing to walk there alone...

Because i wanted to surprise her at her dance class. I just had this urge to give her flowers, blue roses...my, and her fav. So wat happen was that i woke up at 10am, despite sleeping at 4 plus...ok i know it's not too difficult lar...but given the sleepy nature of my to sleep till 12 at least, that's quite good le...

So i considered for so so so so so long about that, like if it will affect her relationship now, wat will she think...blah blah blah, all the shit that i never had to do so...before, i decided not to give flowers...too obvious...i decided to get her some dried orange peel...since she complained that the chinese medicine was too bitter...i tot it would help...

In the end, i was late. When she called me after her lessons, i was still on the way. But her handphone went gone case. As a result, when i reached there, she was gone...i tried to call her...low batt....so this stupid guy just wondered elsewhere around, with this packet of dried orange peel...and not wanting to eat it, still hoping for a miracle that oh, we might bump on the street....talk cock man me.....

I think we really dun have fate man...i can bump into my men which i haven met for 6 months, Jie Wen and Ronald...i can bump into Vernon, i haven met for like 2 years plus...u just cant meet the person on ur mind...

Luckily Jeffrey saved me from going bonkus...

So when we were eating he sort of found out about me and her from my dearest ming jian man...it's ok lar...i just feel weird to be topic of discussion...i guess they were just concern...or maybe they just had nothing to do and laughing at my stupidity...its ok, as long as they treasure their relationship better than me after learning this lesson.

So i told him i wanted to bring flowers but in the end brought dried orange peel, yet never met her.

He was like, "oh, lucky u didn't bring flowers, like so will cause her boyfriend to be jealous lar..."

I told him i did considered that lar...this was so not lixiang like lar...i usually dun give a damn about other people's feeling one, but this time, i did...i surprised myself...because i didn't want to cause trouble in her life with her boyfriend now...cause she seems happy...she said she is. It's just that i m so afraid that anything i do might create friction for them, and she will be sad once more if they quarrel...because of my appearance again...

Jeff added one simple comment "So u are the only one sad now?"

I said "no lar, she's happy rite. i'm ok lor."

I was amazed at how i always manage to simplify my problems when discussing them to seem so cant be bothered, yet i always am very bothered with it lar...such a simple dialog, but it contains something probably so profound, that some people wouldnt understand all their life and would never agree to it, that loving someone is actually feeling happy for them, even when u are not part of their happiness...
I actually hate it when i feel pissed off just because i feel that her boyfriend's not taking good care of her...and i mean really pissed off...

I never wanted to have this kind of feelings and never wanted to act noble or wat...cant i just be a selfish freak or super bastard that does care a damn about how others feel...somtimes i hate myself for that.

Plus...this song kept playing on m MP3 player, it just locked onto my situation and was super saddening...

你是否忘记了
那时候的笑容
如果我已不在你心中
舍不得为什么
你说过的以后
留下我能不能圆梦
那天空云很多
看不见你的轮廓
只剩下太多来不及说

(是我你好吗 没什么事 只是想知道你好不好
这是我最后一次打给你了希望你好好照顾自己)

不说出的温柔
让你离开我
我以为你都会懂
等着你
我才发现难过

很难说有没有
想念过你的手
可能是我不愿去触碰
不记得本来你
有没有擦口红
反正是我已经错过
那天空云很多
看不见你的轮廓
剩下太多来不及说
想哭的冲动
开始在失去以后
才等着你的手
拥抱我的寂寞
该说的时候
早应该大声的说
那种认真的沉默
弄巧成拙

不说出的温柔
让你离开我
我以为你都会懂
想哭的冲动
开始在失去以后
已经擦干了泪
为何还有点痛
该说的时候
早应该大声的说
爱已经留下缺口
剩下沉默
不说出的温柔
让你离开我
去拥抱你要的梦
别担心我
我会好好过

I had to find some babies photo to look at to cheer me up...haha...this collection of orphange baby girls photos in black and white...super nice and cute...looking at them really made me smile...It's called 妹妹, there's one book left on Kinokuniya book store in Taka. Can take a look if u want.

Anyway, the moral of the story is that, i was just not meant to fall in love.




I wanted to post it elsewhere secretly, but that blog's all my chinese writings. So i had to post it here...i finally know why some of my fellow blogger friends choose to remain anonymous...but i guess, it's my story anyway...but if anyone's reading this, DUN DISCUSS THIS WITH ME AS IT WILL PISS ME OFF...i dun want to make any comment on it either.

IGNORE ME FOR THE MOMENT, I WILL GET OVER IT SOON...I HOPE

GERMANY is through to the semi finals sia...haha...!!!

Anyway, it was quite exciting watching @ Berwecks with the playboy gang...haha...well less maria who had to send her sister off, and zhen, who left us to go for some camp with her beaut...

Anyway, at first, i tot we were the only Germany supporters there, cause Argentina was more aggressive during the first half and the supporters around were all cheering for Argentina, esp after the first goal, argentina's support in the room were crazy man...haha...and no one cheered when Germany did nice shot or defended well...except me and ming ming...ok, sometimes sherwayn...

Until the 80th min, when Klose scored, it was like suddenly the place was lit up with lots of Germany supporters...who have been very quiet throughout the match man...haha...so funny...

Anyway, when Germnay pushed to penalty, we knew the Germans would win le lar...Lehman was a stronger keeper....plus, the main keeper of argentina was injured, and the sub was really alittle off in standard...he kept diving wrongly lar...

So that's it.


Yan Lian, correct le wor...
Baby's breath is the flower of innocence. Represent everlasting love.
Baby's breath also represent 想念。
Lavender does represent devotion.
Lavender also represent 等待爱情。

Get well soon ya.